Christmas!

Christmas came early for me - sort of. It's actually coming late for me too... Guy is getting me a puppy! He decided to tell me early what he was getting me so I could help pick it out. So we went last night to see the puppies and pick one out. They're only 3 weeks old right now, so we won't actually get her until mid-January... But here's a picture of me and my puppy!!! :) It was taken with Guy's camera phone, which is the worst camera phone on earth, so it's not a great pic, but oh well, it's what we have. She's pretty tiny right now anyway, so it was hard to get a pic of her not curled up. :)

ahhh... life flying by

Amazing how life flies. I remember when I was a kid and my mom would be talking with one of her friends. I would be waiting very impatiently to go.. and every two seconds or so going "mom! Mom! MOM!!!" Until she'd tell me that she'd be two minutes... TWO MINUTES? That is an insanely long time to a child. I didn't even know how to count two whole mintues (which is why she'd never say "10 seconds", because we would count!). And now weeks go by without me noticing... but I still have the same type of impatience - when I get stuck behind someone driving slow, or am waiting for Guy to get ready to go somewhere, or am walking behind someone in a store... The five seconds it takes for them to get out of my way feels like an eternity. But I still have no idea how life seems to be flying by so quickly.

Guy and I celebrated our 6 month anniversary on Sunday. It doesn't seem like it was 6 months ago that we got married. We still haven't sent out our Thank-you's (and to those of you that we owe one to, know that we have one written with your name on the envelope... They're just waiting to be addressed and sent out.... still).

It doesn't seem like much has changed in the last 6 months, except the trees lost their leaves and the world got cold. We're still grieving the loss of Guy's dad (the father-in-law I never got to have). Holidays make it harder again, right when we were starting to get better with it. We're still both wanting to move away, knowing we can't leave, thinking of buying houses or changing apartments and then realizing we can't afford it right now. We're still working at jobs we don't like, not saving enough money and just paying bills. We're surviving through the seasons. We're learning how being married differs from dating. We're spending time with family, friends and each other. That's life right now.

This year the holidays are so different than every other year before it. There is a sadness I've never experience before. A desperation to cherish every moment and be happy through the season, but the sorrow still creeps in, no matter how much we try to be joyful. But then there is a greater joy to the season - as if we are all looking around and realizing we want to spend each moment with each other to the fullest. I've had more flashback moments this year than ever before - where I'll look around me and feel like I am at some other time in my life. Earlier today it felt like when I lived in England, and it made me want to go buy daffodils at the market and drink a cup of hot tea. A couple days ago it felt like Collingdale, and I would have given anything to go out for lunch like the old days. Maybe a week ago it felt like when I was in middle school before my parents got divorced - when I enjoyed the winter weather. It's like I'm living my life over again in small snippets. Oddly, it gives me a warm, fuzzy feeling. I know, I'm odd.

Life has been good.