Christmas!

Christmas came early for me - sort of. It's actually coming late for me too... Guy is getting me a puppy! He decided to tell me early what he was getting me so I could help pick it out. So we went last night to see the puppies and pick one out. They're only 3 weeks old right now, so we won't actually get her until mid-January... But here's a picture of me and my puppy!!! :) It was taken with Guy's camera phone, which is the worst camera phone on earth, so it's not a great pic, but oh well, it's what we have. She's pretty tiny right now anyway, so it was hard to get a pic of her not curled up. :)

ahhh... life flying by

Amazing how life flies. I remember when I was a kid and my mom would be talking with one of her friends. I would be waiting very impatiently to go.. and every two seconds or so going "mom! Mom! MOM!!!" Until she'd tell me that she'd be two minutes... TWO MINUTES? That is an insanely long time to a child. I didn't even know how to count two whole mintues (which is why she'd never say "10 seconds", because we would count!). And now weeks go by without me noticing... but I still have the same type of impatience - when I get stuck behind someone driving slow, or am waiting for Guy to get ready to go somewhere, or am walking behind someone in a store... The five seconds it takes for them to get out of my way feels like an eternity. But I still have no idea how life seems to be flying by so quickly.

Guy and I celebrated our 6 month anniversary on Sunday. It doesn't seem like it was 6 months ago that we got married. We still haven't sent out our Thank-you's (and to those of you that we owe one to, know that we have one written with your name on the envelope... They're just waiting to be addressed and sent out.... still).

It doesn't seem like much has changed in the last 6 months, except the trees lost their leaves and the world got cold. We're still grieving the loss of Guy's dad (the father-in-law I never got to have). Holidays make it harder again, right when we were starting to get better with it. We're still both wanting to move away, knowing we can't leave, thinking of buying houses or changing apartments and then realizing we can't afford it right now. We're still working at jobs we don't like, not saving enough money and just paying bills. We're surviving through the seasons. We're learning how being married differs from dating. We're spending time with family, friends and each other. That's life right now.

This year the holidays are so different than every other year before it. There is a sadness I've never experience before. A desperation to cherish every moment and be happy through the season, but the sorrow still creeps in, no matter how much we try to be joyful. But then there is a greater joy to the season - as if we are all looking around and realizing we want to spend each moment with each other to the fullest. I've had more flashback moments this year than ever before - where I'll look around me and feel like I am at some other time in my life. Earlier today it felt like when I lived in England, and it made me want to go buy daffodils at the market and drink a cup of hot tea. A couple days ago it felt like Collingdale, and I would have given anything to go out for lunch like the old days. Maybe a week ago it felt like when I was in middle school before my parents got divorced - when I enjoyed the winter weather. It's like I'm living my life over again in small snippets. Oddly, it gives me a warm, fuzzy feeling. I know, I'm odd.

Life has been good.

blog readers

Over the past couple of weeks I've realized that people actually read this. This surprised me. I know people sometimes leave comments, which means that you must occasionally glance over this, but I had 3 people ask me about something they had first read about on here... Strange... But thanks for reading! That is the point, I guess. :)

The last few days have gone by in a daze for me. I've been pretty sick with a head cold. I'm down to just being stuffed up and dizzy now. At least the massive exhaustion has seemed to be appeased (as I slept all weekend). I'm a little worried that Guy will be getting sick now, as I get cuddly when I'm sick. Despite his best efforts to stay away from me, I generally win.

They're calling for snow here tomorrow night. Bleck. I don't want fall to be over yet. I was just starting to really enjoy it. It was finally perfect fall weather. But with where we live, snow is inevitable before halloween.

We're not moving until spring. We kind of ramshackle-decided that when the deal fell through with Guy's cousins. We're stable where we're at, and we don't want to do anything foolish. So we're waiting it out and saving up. Guy understands me well enough to know that having lived in one apartment for TWO YEARS is getting to me... so he offered to change things up for me. We're switching our bedroom with our office/library/catch-all room. It might appease me with enough of a change for the time being. We still haven't agreed as to what constitutes "spring"... I say February-March, he says a little later on... We'll see.... And no, we don't have any ideas where we're moving or if we're buying around here or what... We'll see.

series of unfortunate events

Guy called me today to tell me some bad news. The way our lives have gone this year, I assumed someone must have died or been seriously injured. His voice had that very hesitant, sad, and bad news type of quality for it. I prepared myself for the worst. So when he told me that we won't be living at his cousins house for the winter because his cousin isn't going to California, it didn't upset me as much as it may have, had I not been prepared for another funeral or series of hospital visits. And it made me realize what a terrible year we've had. Whenever someone calls to tell me bad news, I expect death or severe injury. Is this the way life should be? Every time you hear that something is wrong you assume you've lost yet another person in your life? I sincerely hope next year is better.

And with that said, we won't be moving into Guy's cousins house. No free rent, no saving money to move. Now we have to decide what we want to do... Stay where we are? Find a new apartment? Move? Buy a house? We're both sick of our apartment, but it's not a bad place to live. It's ok. It's comfortable. Our landlord is great, as is the lady that lives upstairs... But I'm extremely antsy and ready for a change, and Guy wants to get to that next step in our lives.

Visit to Philly was great. Got to see some wonderful friends and spend time away from home (which is always good for me!). Homecoming was a little sad, but since that was just my cover for the visit to see friends, it served it's purpose. And most likely will never have to serve that purpose again. I don't think I'll go back for another homecoming. We walked around for a very small part of the afternoon and then left, wondering why we had gone.

I had yesterday off. I didn't get the house as clean as I thought I would. We had turkey dinner with my sister last night to celebrate (Happy Thanksgiving!). And I don't think we have much planned for this week or weekend. It should be nice and quiet. :)

philly

We're headed to Philly for the weekend, leaving tonight after work. Well, after Guy gets out of work, which will end up being at about 8 pm... So we're headed towards Philly tonight, probably stopping at some skeezy hotel along the way and continuing our travels tomorrow.

We're going for a mix of reasons. One is that it's homecoming. I've never been to homecoming, so why not? I figure more people might be in town that I normally wouldn't see, although I doubt that will actually happen. Two, I haven't seen people in awhile. There was the wedding back in June, but honestly, you don't feel like you see people at your own wedding. I would have liked to spend hour long conversations with everyone that came, but it just doesn't work. As it was, I barely got to spend time with my sister who came all the way from BC! So seeing friends will be nice. Three, I'm trying to convince Guy that southern PA isn't a bad place to live. Not necessarily Philly, but down that way... We want to move. I'm set on going south again ( the "buy a house" or "move away from Buffalo" desires keep switching back and forth with me). But if we move to NC, we both have to take the national massage exam ($295 each), and neither of us have looked at books since passing our NY state boards. So there would be a lot of studying involved to begin. PA doesn't have massage requirements. You still have to be registered/certified, but you don't have to pass a national/state exam. (I know, that makes those of you in Philly think twice about your massage therapist, doesn't it?). I have no doubt that we could pass that nationals once we study up for it, but Guy has horrible test anxiety. I digress. I think that's it. Those are my 3 reasons. And because I feel like I haven't gotten away from here lately. :)

So if you're in the area, give me a ring or a text. I probably won't be online till after our return, but you can try me on facebook too. I might check it, who knows.

politics

For those of you who know me well, you know I've never been one to get too inspired to follow politics. Generally I figure the best of two evils still isn't that good, and I don't want to have a part in deciding which evil will be head of this country. That and I felt like voting in America takes me that much farther away from being Canadian, which is something I would rather not give up.

But this year something changed. Maybe I see a bigger difference between the candidates. Maybe I understand how it will affect me more, as I'm looking to buy a house and am finally realizing I'm going to live in this country long-term. And maybe I'm just a little more American now that I've married one (although I say it makes him half Canadian and doesn't affect me at all, since I already was half American). Regardless of the reasons, this year I am following politics.

I am not the type of person that will say you're an idiot if you disagree with my choice... As long as you have your reasons. I am the type of person that says you're an idiot if you don't research and understand what each politician says they stand for (let's be honest, how much of what they say is true, on either side?) and pick your politician because of what party they are from. Do political parties really make a difference in today's world? If you have made your choice for whatever reasons you think are important in todays world - great! If you've made your choice because of what others say is important, or because of what party you are part of, or because of some uninformed ideals that you might have - don't even try to talk politics with me.

So I'm trying to convince Guy (who is also following the presidential candidate race) that he should vote this year. It's the first year I'm voting. I feel like I want a say in what happens this year. I feel like if everyone who normally doesn't vote (for whatever reasons) actually does vote this year, maybe it'll make a difference. Guy says that his one vote won't matter anyway. That's when I tell him about this: One governor race in a town out west (can't recall the name right now... will research) that was due to win by a landslide. EVERYONE was voting for him, and everyone knew it. In fact, no one was going to be voting for the oponent. So in an act of charity, he voted for his oponent. Because everyone in town was sure he was winning, no one else voted. Not one. The "sure to lose" politician won with 100% of the votes, which was the one vote from his oponent.

So here are some other "just one vote' reasons:

• In 1776, the American colonists had come from many different countries and were deciding what the new country’s official language would be. Just one vote decided that Americans would speak English rather than German.
• Women won the right to vote in 1920 by the passage of the 19th Amendment to the Constitution. Tennessee, the last state needed to pass the amendment, ratified the amendment by one vote.
• In 1845 just one vote... brought Texas into the Union
• In 1850, the young U.S. government was deciding whether or not it wanted to grow to the West. Just one vote made California a part of the United States.
• In 1876 just one vote... made Rutherford B. Haynes President of the U.S.
• In 1923 just one vote... gave Adolf Hitler leadership of the Nazi Party.

So, if you speak english, are a woman, live in texas or live in california - one vote made the difference.

And had two more people voted against Hitler, we wouldn't have had half as many problems...

I am not going to use this to say who I think should win. Talk to me and you'll be able to figure it out pretty quickly. Both candidates have opposite stands on the things I think are important (one lines up with some of my views, the other lines up with the rest). But in the grand scheme of things, I'm choosing the one that I think will make the difference.

New website - again

So I have recreated my website. I'm currently waiting to link it to "my" domain (rgsphotography.net)... which in the meantime won't get you anywhere because I broke the link. Apparently I haven't learned how to go about this the proper way yet. So for the next couple days it's stalled. BUT!!! You can see my new website here and please, please, please let me know what you think!!! It's actually at a point where I would call it "done" (until I get more portraits done and actually make some pages from that). And that even includes my galleries, which on my other website were sadly lacking.

Speaking of! If you are: engaged, pregnant, just had a baby, have kids, or even just want your picture taken - LET ME KNOW!! I need more portrait experience. Or even if you're married and feel like wearing your dress again and having pictures taken of you - I'm up for it!

For those of you in Philly - We're coming down the weekend of October 10th. I will be brining my camera with me. I may even be forcing some of you to pose... :)

Other than that - no news. :)

End of September....

So "my" house sold. Sadness. It was on the market for over 6 months and then 15 minutes before our realtor called to schedule a showing, they accepted an offer on it. I was pretty sad for a bit, but it's just not meant to be. We looked at other houses, crossed all but one off our list and are now just kind of waiting. We both liked the last house we looked at. It's in our price range. It's in the town I want to live in (and was the only house we looked at in that town). It's HUGE and was kept up well (except needs a new roof), even though it was a foreclosure. It has a good sized yard... but we both feel like we should wait a little bit and see. Our realtor said he's going to do some background checking on it and get back to us with more info. So we'll see.

We have decided to move into Guy's cousins house. We took Chief over for a play date with the German Shephards again on Sunday. They were still curious about Chief, but by the end of the night they all calmed down and laid down. So that's good. It probably won't be till December, which made me realize we won't have Christmas in our own place this year... kind of sad, but oh well. Maybe next Christmas will be in our own house, which is even better!

We're headed to Philly next weekend (Oct 10th)... So if you're out there, reading this and want to see us, oh friends in Philly, let me know! We're coming down Thursday night (late-late) and staying till Sunday sometime. We'll be going to homecoming, which I've never done before. So let me know if you'll be around and want to get together!

Updates and such

So after finally giving out this web address, life slowed down a bit and I had nothing to update! Well, that and the fact that I liked the wedding picture slideshow so much that I didn't have anything to say that would top that. But I suppose it's about time I at least wrote something.

Life has been slowing down for us, which is very nice after this last summer. On Friday we both looked at each other in shock, realizing that we had NO PLANS for this past weekend. Surely it was a miracle! So we promptly filled up all our free time with little things here and there so that I'm left waking up on Monday morning wondering where the weekend went.

We have been going back and forth between looking for houses to buy and houses to rent. It seems to depend on the day on whether we think we can afford to buy a house, or if we should just continue to rent. Last week we were all about finding places to rent. We found a couple, but nothing nicer and larger than what we have and that would also save us money... unless it was in a bad neighborhood.

We finally decided to get in touch with a realestate agent instead of just looking online and doing "drive by's" of houses that we think look great online, only to find they don't look like they should even been standing in real life. We tried getting in touch with one that Guy knew from school, but she never returned our calls and we could never catch her in the office. So finally we came across the name of one that deals with foreclosures around here and decided to see how good he'd be. He has been amazing so far, and has worked mostly through emails with us (which works best for us, since finding office hours to call people and actually get the time to talk to them is tough). Guy called him Friday afternoon and let him know what sort of houses we were looking for, what price range, and what areas. By that evening he had emailed us listings for about 10 different houses, none of which we had found online ourselves. We emailed back and forth Friday and Saturday and by Saturday evening had a date set with him to look at some of the houses. I just find it amazing that he checks his email all weekend long and gets back to us so quickly!

Saturday we spent driving around to do drive-by's of the houses we will be looking at on the 28th. We've already crossed a few of those off the list due to location or train tracks or the yards, but there are still a few we're interested in... And one favorite. It has a large yard, is farther into the country, but still isn't too far from my work. The foundation looks solid (from the outside) and although we will probably do some cosmetic work on it, it looks like something we could just move into without too much trouble... but still looks like something that could use some TLC, which we want to give a house. It's an estate sale, and is listed for much lower than the assessed value. So we'll see. Here's a couple pics:

Sunday we went to Guy's mom's house and got given a pretty good offer. Guy's cousin and her husband were there and was saying how they were going to be moving to California for 5 months during the winter, and were wondering if we knew of anyone who would be willing to house sit because they can't leave their 2 German Shephards alone. So we're thinking about doing that... Free rent and utilities for 5 months would definitely help us save up for a house! The only thing holding us back right now is Chief... We need to make sure that the dogs get along, since German Shephards can be mean, and Chief is pretty small. So we're going to let the dogs meet and go over details with them somtime this week. Keep your fingers crossed!

Our Wedding

...fall?

This weekend was spent mostly in our house. Sleeping. I don't know how both of us managed to sleep as much as we did, but it was lovely. Both Saturday and Sunday were rainy, fall-feeling days, and Guy and I spent them as such. I did do laundry, and dishes, and we reorganized our kitchen cupboards... But that's about it. On Friday we went out with some friends for karaoke (which Guy loves and has been wanting to do for weeks now). Saturday we slept in, took a long nap and watched movies. Sunday we slept in, cleaned a bit, then finally kicked ourselves out of the house to go visit Guy's mom (and use her hot tub!). So nothing of much importance to report.

This next weekend we're going to visit my family. My mom is visiting my brother, which is halfway between us and her. He also lives about 10 minutes from my dad, so we figure we'll get to see everyone at one time. Otherwise that's about it.

We got some pictures other people took at Josh and Sarah's wedding last weekend... This is one of my favorites of us:

Photography Website!!!!!

I finally got my photography website up... http://www.rgsphotography.net/

It is still in massive overhaul mode, and I don't have the right photos or enough photos on it at all... So be kind in your judgement, dear blog-stalkers. Once I actually get through formatting the 3 weddings I took pictures at, I might have some more (better) photos to put on there. And once I've taken some of the portraits I have lined up, it will be much better! Now if I can just figure out a better way to display the pics.... But for now it's up and running!

We went to Pittsburg this past weekend for Guy's cousin's wedding. We missed the actual ceremony, but made it for the reception. It was a nice time away. We came back on Sunday and thankfully I had yesterday to recover!

This is one of my favorites:

... what's best is that he got her to dance with him later

End of August already???

It's amazing how quickly weeks seem to be passing this year. It's already the end of August! This weekend we are going to Pittsburg for Guy's cousin's wedding. Guy is planning on wearing his kilt to it, which obviously means I need a new dress... :) So that's one more thing to accomplish today.

Lately things have been going ok. Guy's work is still pretty stressful, but mine has calmed down a bit... Or at least I stopped doing someone else's project and am now able to do my own work a little more.

I'm kicking into gear with the wedding photography. I shot a wedding last weekend, which was very fun (and VERY HOT!). I only went for the ceremony and formals, which actually aren't my favorite part of wedding photography. I love the getting ready shots and the reception shots... But it was still awesome. I'm doing prenatal portraits with my sister, and setting up two engagement portrait sessions with friends around here for experience. One of the friends has already asked me to photograph her wedding as well next spring. So all I need to do is register my business, figure out a developer, get my website set up and set prices... not too hard, just the business side of things... that I'm not all the familiar with. And I need a better lens.


I also finally got the CDs from my wedding, which means I can now print whatever pictures I want!

Sculpture park and weekends

A few days ago we went to Sculpture Park, which is actually just a bunch of fields that these people decided to put random sculptures in sometime in the 70's, and which has now turned into an extremely modest tourist attraction, for those in this area that know about it... And are able to find it. It's down a bunch of back roads, misleading signs (at one intersection it tells you to turn both right and left to get there, with the bigger sign pointing to the right, but you have to actually turn left or you'll get completely lost), and then you come to what looks like another driveway, except there is this very large structure of crates piled on top of each other in the shape of an oval. That is how you get there. Then you wander around these fields full of statues. No maps are handed out (indeed, no one is there to even tell you it's open or closed... payment is on the honor system). There are some maps on plaques around the park, but not many... and some of the plaques don't even have maps on them. Regardless, the maps that are there don't help all that much... unless you are there with someone who has been there before, which I was!

Naturally, I took pictures... here are a couple of my favorites:

I'm having a problem uploading the rest... so more to come :)

I also photographed a wedding on Saturday and will be putting them on my wedding photography website, which is in complete "in process" stages and I haven't had the time to fix it up the way I'd like to... so take it as a practice and not as all I've done or am able to do... RSG Photography

Oh, also - Andrew and/or Don, you may or may not read this, but it will remind me later - I need your expertise, advise, wisdom and help (yes, all four of those)... should I mention I love you dearly?

happy house hunting

I searched the web last night. I found cheap houses! Foreclosures are happy things (...when it doesn't happen to you). They lead to cheap housing... mostly in need of a little TLC, but Guy and I actually want to give a house TLC. We want something to pour our sweat in tears into... We may change our mind on that when it comes down to it, but right now getting a decrepit old house and turning it into a cozy home sounds a little bit like heaven.

So after work I got home in a very anxious mood (not sure why, but everything was taking too long and frustrating me to no end). I told Guy about the houses I had found online, and he offered to go for a drive and look at them. So we packed ourselves and our dog in the car (Chief can never get enough car rides) and drove to a small, partially country town. I have decided that we are going to live in that town. Something about it makes me feel welcome and like I belong. Strange feeling for a girl that has never been able to settle. But I can see springs, summers and falls passing by there. I cringe to think of the winters, but that's how WNY is... Winter makes you cringe. But you live through them and come out on the other side and have a greater appreciation for any sort of warmth and sunlight. Maybe I'm just looking for reasons to love it here. People always try to say that one of the great things is that you get four seasons here... The thing is, I grew up with only three and didn't mind it all that much. The few times we'd get winter (i.e., snow), we were insanely appreciative of it. It was our christmas wish and the times it would come through was magical. Here you don't have to wish for snow... it happens every year, for several months. But I don't mind not having four seasons, so I can't use that as something to cherish about this place. Anyway, we went and drove around the town we are going to live in (there's even a Kazoo museum there! It's the first place to manufacture Kazoo's in America ...and if that's not enough to make you fall in love with it, I feel sorry for you). We found an adorable house for sale, that I fell instantly in love with. Alas, it's about $20,000 too expensive. So we found the house I had found online... Indeed, it needs TLC. But we could make it work. And for the price, it's worth it.

Then this morning we went and got pre-approved! Surprisingly, we found out we actually can afford to buy a house!!! Yay! One gigantic step closer to actually buying a house. Next is to find a realtor! :)

Guy's bday...

This is us (with Missy and Duane) on the ferris wheel when we went to the fair for Guy's birthday (last Tuesday). The quality isn't the best, since it was taken with my cell phone...

Rainy mornings

I suppose it's been awhile since I've updated with anything real. Quick clips and phrases don't go far for explaining life.

The last two weeks have been just as stressful as the previous week I posted about, for several reasons. Guy's work has been horrible. Mine has been insanely busy and stressful. Our house has been slowly looking more and more like a disaster area, which has stressed me out even more. If our house was a bit messy or disorganized, it never used to bother me. But lately I just want it clean and organized. Not OCD-like or anything, but somewhere that we can come home from our stressful days and relax in. Somewhere that doesn't make me feel like I should be doing the dishes or the laundry or vacuuming whenever I sit down, instead of just letting me relax. It's getting there, slowly but surely. It just has needed a good spring cleaning, and it hasn't been happening. So last weekend I spent time cleaning, and this weekend I'll hopefully get to do some more.

We've put our house hunt on hold for now, since we really can't afford one. So we're looking for a house to rent instead of an apartment... A house, where we don't have to worry if we're vaccuuming at midnight because the lady upstairs might be asleep, because there won't be a lady upstairs. One where our landlord will let us paint the rooms or fix up the place... Our landlord is great, but is a little obsessive-compulsive, so things have to stay how he had them when we moved in. But I want somewhere that the landlord really doesn't mind if we make changes, because he's getting his rent. And somewhere that I feel safe walking around the neighborhood alone at 10 pm in the rain. Not that I do that all too often, but I do it. And where we're at, I don't feel safe doing so.

Otherwise, I've applied for a new position at my work. I'm not holding my breath, but it would be a good career move. I want to move away from Buffalo, but am realizing that isn't going to happen this year. We are needed here for many reasons. We're looking for a better job for Guy... somewhere that he'll be happy with what he's doing, even if it's not his dream job.

I'm looking forward to the weekend, dreaming about a day with nothing planned, hoping for rest and relaxation... but also hoping to get things done.

I need to work on my photography website more.

TGIF

... and thankfully, another weekend begins.

A reminder

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails."

End of the Week Escape

After the week from hell, we decided to de-stress.

For Guy, this meant cruising in our 67 fairlane...

For me, this meant going my favorite park in the whole wide world and forcing Guy to pose for pictures with me....

We swang on the swings....

Then we walked for a bit...

We kissed for a bit...

(the picture is meant to be fuzzy...)

I'm not sure if this one us us kissing or kung-fo fighting...

Then we took lots more pictures of us....

Then Guy told me it was time to go home...


So he got to cruise again...


We also went for dinner at a sushi and steak hibatchi place, which is possibly the perfect combination. I got amazing sushi (my current addiction, which Guy isn't too fond of), and Guy got steak and (cooked) seafood. Happiness is.

Things that make me happy

Coming home to find a vase full of hand-picked wildflowers.

Week at a Glance

It has been a horrible week. I wouldn't mind if it ended today and was just a new week tomorrow. I wouldn't argue, or really even question it. That's how bad it has been.

Work has been horribly busy and just awful. I'm on the implementation team for a new project. It goes into effect on Monday. It was supposed to go into effect on Thursday, but our project leader is a slacker and a master at BSing, and has been lying to everyone (managers, VPs, members of the team) on the status of everything that has to get done. Then he went on vacation for two weeks, one week before the project was supposed to go live. As soon as he was gone, all hell broke loose and we found out that not only were we 10% of the way done (as opposed to the 90% he had been telling us), but that 10% had been done wrong. So for the past two weeks I've been running around like crazy trying to fix all his mistakes, dropping everything I've been working on and just generally going insane. Then he came back on Monday, to some very angry team members and we realized how much more there was to do, how much more he hasn't done, and it's gone downhill. Corporate pushed off implementation until Monday, which bought us a little more time. But it's still been a horrible week.

Then last night Guy and I went to a bbq at some friends house. Friends he has been friends with for a long time. A married couple that were really close friends with him and his ex-gf. Friends that I just don't know how I feel about yet. It was a fun time, and great hanging out with them, and there were a bunch of other people there that were definitely fun to meet. I drank much too much wine, got into an argument with Guy on the way home, somehow ended up sleeping on the couch (I was extremely upset, and now am not so sure why), and don't feel so great today. Poor Guy. If he's going to encourage me to drink when I'm having a bad week, then he has to learn that when I start arguing about something I normally wouldn't freak out over, he just needs to placate me and tell me we'll talk about it in the morning and figure out what we need to do. Because in the morning I won't be able to figure out why I was that upset over something so small. He hasn't learned this yet. But then again, I don't drink that much that often.

House Searching and Fawns

Two nights ago we went looking at houses. We didn't really find anything we loved that we could also afford (although we found many in either of those catagories). We did, however, run across a deer with her twin fawns. They weren't scared of cars or people at all, which worries me somewhat. But they were cute. They knew enough to stay off the road... at least while we watched. But I guess that's what happens when you're a deer growing up in a housing complex.

We rearranged our back room (again) and finally hung up some of the picture frames I've been wanting to hang. Since we're still waiting on wedding pictures to come back from the photographer, most of the frames have fake people in them... But at least they are on the wall where I want them! I also finally hung up my massage therapy license, our dart board and put a new battery in Guy's clock. I can actually see the top of my desk, but only small areas of it. We are getting somewhere though.

I took yesterday off of work in order to get new tires on my car (they were completely bald) and help Guy fix his truck's power steering, which is dead. We didn't get the truck done because Guy needs some other sort of tool to pull something off before he can get to the power steering box. But I have new tires! Yay! Tread! While waiting for my car to be done, we wandered through bed, bath and beyond with some gift cards we had.... So I also got a shoe rack to hang on a door, a new wine bottle opener set and a fogless mirror/clock/radio to put in our shower. Now my shoes are organized, wine bottles are opened with ease, I can dance and sing in the shower, and Guy has a much easier time shaving. Then I dragged him to the new Barnes & Nobles that just opened in that mall, fell in love with some photography how-to books, desperately wanted to buy a few fiction books, and managed to walk out of there with NOTHING. That is no small feat for me... to leave a bookstore without buying anything?? Insane. But I was trying to convince Guy that we really should buy adobe photoshop for me, because it will be super useful and I could do so much more with it... But even with all my great reasons to buy it, price generally wins out, especially when we have two very large car repair bills loaming ahead of us.

Last night I went out for dinner with Missy and Sara (Guy's cousin and cousin-in-law) for Sara's bday. It was nice to hang out with just the girls. So we drank some wine, shared some gossip and then came back to our house to drink more wine and share more stories. It was very chill and very nice. And although I love them to death, I also find that I am needing friends outside of Guy's family. His family is so great, and they get along so well. It's easy to just spend time with them. But if/when Guy and I ever get in an argument, or if I'm even just foolishly frustrated with him, I can't talk to them about it. I always get told he loves me and doesn't mean to annoy me... "that's just Guy". Well of course it is! It's probably one of his annoying traits that I know I can live with (face it, we all have those). But sometimes you just need to vent to someone, and have them agree that "that is annoying!" or tell you you're being ridiculous... His family takes the "oh don't get annoyed... he really loves you" route. I know he loves me. He loves me to death. I love him to death too. But does that mean that we don't annoy each other? Does the fact that he's annoying me or I'm annoying him mean we love each other any less? What's funny is that it's not like Guy and I are having problems, or that he frustrates me all that much (I'd be lying if I said he didn't at all... but I frustrate him too). Sometimes it's just good to talk to someone outside of the situation... Someone that hasn't know him longer than they've known me. So I guess I need to just branch out and make friends. Life seems to be settling down now, so maybe I'll have time to do that sometime soon...

Weekend plans and pictures

My weekend plans were simple for this week. Guy has a DJ gig and massages on Saturday. I would clean the house and relax. Not going anywhere, not doing anything. I was actually pretty excited about that.

Driving home from work yesterday I get a text message from Guy: "Cleveland this weekend?" We had just been talking about how, if we get another free weekend this summer, we're going to go to Cleveland to visit a friend he hasn't seen in years, and to show me the other city he lived in. He's wanted to take me to Cleveland since we first started dating. But something didn't compute... didn't he have massages and a DJ gig? He has to work on Saturday... we're not driving to and from Cleveland all on Sunday! So I get home and learn that his DJ gig has been cancelled, and he has Satuday afternoon and Sunday free. Yay! So we are headed to Cleveland to see the sights and possibly catch an Indian's game. We're trying to get in touch with his friend, but haven't been able to. We're going regardless though, because Guy has wanted to show me where he went to school for awhile.

And pictures... I've been playing with some pictures and changing colors, hue's and saturations... So here are a couple:

birthdays!

Saturday we got internet at home (and yes, we did get the back room cleaned up a bit). That's my bday present to Guy. His birthday isn't until August, but I decided to get it early for him. I have internet at work, he hasn't had it for about 2 years now. The only time he gets online is when he's at his mom's house. And she has insanely slow dial-up. So they came and installed it Saturday before Guy got home from massages. He came home and tested it out and was astounded at how fast it went (being DSL). I thought that was cute, because I'm used to fast internet at work.

Guy with a sparkler

Sunday was my dad and brother's birthday. Guy and I headed out to the lake house Saturday night to visit and spend their birthday's with them. We lit sparklers, played in mudpuddles, had cake, visited the farm, and thorougly enjoyed our time away. It was great to spend time with my brothers family. They just moved back from living in Maine. It was too far of a drive to make often. But my neice and nephew have grown tremendously. My nephew used to be super shy and not talk to anyone at all. This trip he was following me around and showing me all of his toys and just loving that we were there.

With my neice and nephew at the lake

Then we came home late last night, got very little sleep, and started off a new exhausting week. But our house is getting more organized, and more like we live there. It's only taken 2 years to get to that point. Now that we're married and looking to buy a house, I feel like we should get this one in good order. Throw things away that we don't need. Spend time on the projects that need time spent on them... Like organizing my photos, for example. I have so many pictures, and photo CD's, and photo albums... I need to just go through all of them and organize, and put pictures in the frames we have that are waiting to hang on the wall. We have so many empty frames, and so much empty wall space. I just need to finish things!

My nephew with the sparkler

Me and dad at his farm

The mutant black-eyed susan we found

I've never added pic's before.... So this is my test run. :)

Typical night

Last night was a typical night. I got home and dozed on the couch for awhile until Guy got home. Once he came home we had dinner (left overs) and proceded to decide what to do that night. Do we clean the kitchen, which desperatly needs it? Do we finish doing laundry, folding it and putting it away, while going through our clothes to see which we don't need to keep? Do we try to get some semblance of order in the back room, where someone is coming to install internet tomorrow and will need to get through the disaster?

All of those are things that need to be done. We decided to take a walk instead. We took an hour and a half walk. 3/4ths of the way through Chief decided he had walked far enough and just laid down. Guy had to carry him. By the time we got back home it was dark out, and we were hot and tired. So we watched a movie.

This is why things don't get done in our house. We are both masters at procrastination and distraction. I love having my house clean. I love having things in order and easy to find, use and put back away. But I never seem to get it to that point. I find I would rather have fun and spend my time enjoying life than worrying about the dirt and clutter.

So tonight the attempt will be to clean the back room. To get it to a point where the guy coming to install our internet can actually get to the computer and work with the computer without having to step around: a futon mattress, an empty fish tank and stand, two massage tables, a bedside table and a very large plant. These are all things that have been stored in the middle of the room. The room is crowded enough with 4 bookshelves, 2 desks and an armchair. This also doesn't include the amount of junk stored on top of Guy's desk that we will need to do something with so we can use the computer once it has internet. I just don't know where we're going to put everything. Hopefully I can convince Guy to throw some of it away. He's a bit of a pack rat and told me yesterday that "throwing things out is hard" for him. I'm more of a minimalist and enjoy having the space. So that's the agenda for today....

Another new blog

I have started several blogs. None of them last past a first, sometimes second, post. I keep wanting to tell far away friends about my life, but then wish for real contact with those friends, and a blog that someone reads and rarely comments on does not suffice. And how do you choose who finds your blog? Anyone can find anyone online. So we read about each other's lives and rarely call or write or visit. A blog, or a message, or a comment on a page does not replace face-to-face contact and converstaions. But in this fast world where we can be constantly connected and never see each other, you lose touch with each other's lives. So I'm going to try again. Try to give a snapshot of my life so my friends know what we're up to, but hopefully still keep in touch with those friends in real life as well.

So here I am. My title for the blog is something I've never tried to do before... Settle down and stabilize myself. But I'm newly married to the man of all my dreams, and to a man who is not any of the versions I imagined he would be in order to fulfill all of those dreams. Funny how that works. We're looking for a house in an area neither of us want to live in... But life happens and plans change. In our case, we need to be around his family more than we need to leave. I want a house of our own... one where I can plant a garden and paint the walls. One where he can tear down walls and build new ones. Something we can take and make into our own, into something that reflects who we are. I'm working a job that doesn't thrill me, but pays the bills. We're crossing fingers for a promotion for both of us... Mine to get me into something that will use my brain a little more, and him to a manager position. But both of those promotions would cross massage therapy from our lists. I already don't use my massage therapist license. He uses his, but won't if he gets promoted to manager. Because you can't be a part-time manager.

So that is our beginning point. Lots of options for our new future together.